Love and Loss

Hi lovelies,

I have a day off work as I use up my annual leave for this financial year. I thought, ‘What can I do with my day?’ There is always housework to do and life admin, I can do some crafts, I can catch up on Netflix or I can arrange to go out, but I don’t feel like doing any of those things!

I am in quite a reflective mood right now. I feel like I need an escape and to check back in with myself. I have recently read that Sister Stories are hosting another retreat in May which was so renewing and healing last time. It couldn’t have come at a better time.

Sister Stories is the organisation I trained with to become a women’s circle facilitator. The power that lies in the company and support of other women is transformational. I join circles to reflect and move forward. I am hoping to attend this year as I am in need of that space again.

Since participating in the last retreat, I have lost my uncle and more recently my cat of 14 years. I know you might be thinking it’s just a cat! But Kaya was part of the family, a rock for all of us. When we were grieving Mikey, he was there to listen and allowed us to pet him to release stress. He supported my son as his best friend, we all loved him so much. Animals have a magical way of just being there, with no expectations of you. That alone is an amazing source of support and healing.

I have come across so many claimed ways of healing, grief support, rebuilding, and therapy. Some of them really work for me and some don’t at all. I believe and recognise that we are all different and what may work for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another. The important thing is that we are open to trying new and different ways of healing so we don’t become stuck and remain in the dark.

After losing Kaya, I could quite easily fall back into that spiral of pain, grief, self-pity and self-destruct but I have learnt that taking a moment, a breath and making a choice works best for me. 

Writing has become a healing process for me. The act of getting my thoughts out onto a piece of paper or these days a screen enables me to recognise when I need to be kind to myself and leave the list of jobs at least for one day and do what strengthens me. I have no secret super-power that makes me strong. Since losing my sight I have been told this by many people. I am a woman who is finding her way in the world, whilst learning all the time.

I encourage you to take a moment in the day to reflect. You could use your breath, go for a walk or focus whilst the kettle boils for a brew. Reflection is a great source of knowledge. A way to know ourselves and understand what we need at any given moment. It can be done in a few moments. Getting into this practice will support any change happening in your life, be open to it.

As always, the words in this blog are my own and open to interpretation. If you have any comments or wish to share the tools that support you, please do in the comments. As long as we are kind as we don’t care for negative bashing. We are all individual and are here to support each other where we can, even if that is just a thought.

Sending love,

Nina